OUR BEST EFFORTS...

Well, today was both my first day to weigh in after a week on Jenny Craig, and Jeffie's very first official swimming lesson....

My weight was been an issue for me on and off pretty much ever since I can remember. I obviously have a combination of things at work here, with the most obvious one being, I LOVE to eat, and I eat too much...I also think some people, do to their own particular metabolisms', gain weight easier than others. I think I have that....Then, some people eat when their emotional...sad, happy, excited, fearful, bored, stressed, etc. I most certainly have that.....Then, some people love going out to eat or getting together with family and friends over food, and I definitely have that too.... I also love to bake and try new recipes...haha Sooo, as you can see I have PLENTY of reasons "WHY" this has always been the case for me...I really wish though I could go back to when I was younger and just "THOUGHT" I was heavy, (and trust me I really wasn't) and could relive those days enjoying what I looked like, instead of always being dissatisfied. I wish I would have told myself then, that having 4 kids wasn't a good enough reason not to be thin. I wish I had actually taken the time and trouble to actually go through the maintenance programs of the diets that I used to lose a GREAT deal of weight in the past. I wish I had stopped myself BEFORE I got high blood pressure, or made my knees sooo painful I can hardly walk around on them, or before I no doubt probably put myself at least on the verge of diabetes.....But, here I am, and the old saying I hate is very applicable... it is what it is.....Soooo again, I am on a diet program....Again, I will have to plan ahead to accommodate what I can or cannot eat, again, I will definitely feel and hear my stomach growl, again, I will have to go months and months doing everything I possible can to get my weight down where it belongs. Again I will tell myself I CAN do it and pray that the Lord will give me the will power and the strength....Again, again, again, you'd think that somewhere, someday I might actually "get it" and not only be done with all this, but never being able to look down and see the numbers on the scale I want to see..

So, I officially lost 4.2 pounds my first week on the program, and I feel pretty good about it. The food is REALLY good, even if the portions are pretty nipped. I was hungry for sure this last week, but not unbearably, so I imagine I will survive. It was hard I am not going to lie....It was annoying carting my food where ever I was going, and not being able to eat out like I enjoy...but I really don't have a choice so I have decided I am going for it. One more time I am going to give it my best effort and get the weight all the way off and then enjoy being the age I really am rather than making myself "old" before I really am...I am going to find a place on my blog page where I will post my weight loss each week (for those of you who read this, haha) and use that as just another way to hold myself accountable. I have found that the more I do things like that the better I am....This is going to take me a long, long time, so I am going to just move along (as I tell my kids) and enjoy the rest of my life and try not to dwell too much on what I am, or am not eating....

Soooo, on a completely other note, little Jeff did very well today. He was very brave, and managed to get in and "move along" with his swim lesson even though he was terrified and started off in tears. He jumped in (holding on to her hands and not letting the water go over his head, but still) and did everything he was asked to do. Grandma was very proud of him....To celebrate this (and OK Leah's Bday a couple of days early) we all went and had lunch at the Rainforest Cafe (me bringing my Jenny Craig salad kit along of course haha). He was such a happy camper there surrounded by all his beloved animals. Tomorrow will probably bring more tears when it's again time to get into the pool, but I know he will give it his best effort, and that's all any of us can do....