WHY DIDN'T I SAY IT?!?

Well, time has certainly slowed down, and maybe even TOO much, haha....These last couple of days have been spent catching up on the phone, and laundry, just generally taking it easy. Our week-end was soo nice, and how grateful I am. Church on Sunday was just wonderful. I am soo enjoying getting to know some of the people. Having not been a part of a small church in over 20 years, I had honestly forgotten how wonderful it is to really know some of the members. This is such a difficult thing to do when the church is as large as Calvary Chapel of the Chino Valley, (our home church for over 20 years) and even more so when you have a personality like mine. I am actually somewhat shy and reserved in a group setting till I become comfortable with the people. That doesn't work well in LARGE crowds, haha. Anyway, this last Sun I was chatting with a few of the older ladies who have been attending there for quite a while. These women are all in their late 70's or early 80's. I LOVE this age group. I think because I just feel so many of them have got such wise things to say, and are never in a hurry, just soo sweet. Do you know what I mean? Anyway, one of the gals was asking me where I lived and all the other standard getting to know questions, and found out for the first time I guess (I thought everyone knew that by now, haha) that I was the Pastor's mother. She quickly began telling me how wonderful she thinks he is, and how she is learning from him even though she thought by now there wasn't much left to teach her as she has been a Christian all her life, haha...She loves his humor (which I was glad to hear... I think he is hysterical, but then I AM his mother, lol) and his heart, and feels like the church has been soo blessed to get him. These are all wonderful things to hear of course as his mother. But then she said, "How proud you must be to know you raised a man like him. You obviously did SUCH a good job, and now you can feel sooo pleased." I mumbled a thanks at the time, but truthfully I wish now I had said what I was really thinking. "If I take credit and responsibility for the good things James has become and done, then does that mean that I have to take responsibility and credit for ALL the bad choices he's made in his life as well, or for the rest of my children too?" And while of course I do feel like we did do some things the way we should have, and God has blessed those efforts, there is NO DOUBT in my mind who can take the credit for the heart he has today. For the man he is; that any of my children have a heart for God, and are living their lives hopefully to please Him. Jesus Christ is the ONLY one who can work such a miracle in someone's life. He is the one who is responsible for giving him the servant’s heart that he has, or the love that he wants to share with this church. He and He alone can take ANY man/woman and equip them what they need to live such a life. No matter how they were raised, or what mistakes they have made. Left to our own, no one can ever quite get the job done. I DO thank Him that He has done the work in the lives of my children that He has, and how I pray that it continues. And while it might be nice to pat myself on the back and say, "Yes, you have raised wonderful children" I (if anyone does) know just how much I have done wrong, and how many ways I have failed. I will be forever grateful that my God is as merciful and mighty that He is. So now I ask myself, "Why didn't I say it?"


Hope you are all having a good week. I am going to Joanne's later today for some fabric as I have some things to make for another coming baby (yeah!) and they are having a sale, AND I have coupons, haha. My washer seems to have bit the dust though this morning. Hopefully we can just get it repaired, though the burnt smell I smelled doesn't make me too hopeful. And one last thing....I am TRYING to work out the details that I might go to Melody's next month. I sooo want to help her get the nursery together (they are painting and putting the furniture together this week-end) and go to her Texas shower, and just spend some time at her house BEFORE the baby is born. I haven't been there in over 2 and half years. It is just time. But it just seems like it is not going to happen. I am still praying. And still hoping....And still dreaming about the time. So if you could say a prayer or two as well, I'd really appreciate it....Have a wonderful week! Till I write again....