Tuesday, July 19, 2011

WHY DIDN'T I SAY IT?!?

Well, time has certainly slowed down, and maybe even TOO much, haha....These last couple of days have been spent catching up on the phone, and laundry, just generally taking it easy. Our week-end was soo nice, and how grateful I am. Church on Sunday was just wonderful. I am soo enjoying getting to know some of the people. Having not been a part of a small church in over 20 years, I had honestly forgotten how wonderful it is to really know some of the members. This is such a difficult thing to do when the church is as large as Calvary Chapel of the Chino Valley, (our home church for over 20 years) and even more so when you have a personality like mine. I am actually somewhat shy and reserved in a group setting till I become comfortable with the people. That doesn't work well in LARGE crowds, haha. Anyway, this last Sun I was chatting with a few of the older ladies who have been attending there for quite a while. These women are all in their late 70's or early 80's. I LOVE this age group. I think because I just feel so many of them have got such wise things to say, and are never in a hurry, just soo sweet. Do you know what I mean? Anyway, one of the gals was asking me where I lived and all the other standard getting to know questions, and found out for the first time I guess (I thought everyone knew that by now, haha) that I was the Pastor's mother. She quickly began telling me how wonderful she thinks he is, and how she is learning from him even though she thought by now there wasn't much left to teach her as she has been a Christian all her life, haha...She loves his humor (which I was glad to hear... I think he is hysterical, but then I AM his mother, lol) and his heart, and feels like the church has been soo blessed to get him. These are all wonderful things to hear of course as his mother. But then she said, "How proud you must be to know you raised a man like him. You obviously did SUCH a good job, and now you can feel sooo pleased." I mumbled a thanks at the time, but truthfully I wish now I had said what I was really thinking. "If I take credit and responsibility for the good things James has become and done, then does that mean that I have to take responsibility and credit for ALL the bad choices he's made in his life as well, or for the rest of my children too?" And while of course I do feel like we did do some things the way we should have, and God has blessed those efforts, there is NO DOUBT in my mind who can take the credit for the heart he has today. For the man he is; that any of my children have a heart for God, and are living their lives hopefully to please Him. Jesus Christ is the ONLY one who can work such a miracle in someone's life. He is the one who is responsible for giving him the servant’s heart that he has, or the love that he wants to share with this church. He and He alone can take ANY man/woman and equip them what they need to live such a life. No matter how they were raised, or what mistakes they have made. Left to our own, no one can ever quite get the job done. I DO thank Him that He has done the work in the lives of my children that He has, and how I pray that it continues. And while it might be nice to pat myself on the back and say, "Yes, you have raised wonderful children" I (if anyone does) know just how much I have done wrong, and how many ways I have failed. I will be forever grateful that my God is as merciful and mighty that He is. So now I ask myself, "Why didn't I say it?"


Hope you are all having a good week. I am going to Joanne's later today for some fabric as I have some things to make for another coming baby (yeah!) and they are having a sale, AND I have coupons, haha. My washer seems to have bit the dust though this morning. Hopefully we can just get it repaired, though the burnt smell I smelled doesn't make me too hopeful. And one last thing....I am TRYING to work out the details that I might go to Melody's next month. I sooo want to help her get the nursery together (they are painting and putting the furniture together this week-end) and go to her Texas shower, and just spend some time at her house BEFORE the baby is born. I haven't been there in over 2 and half years. It is just time. But it just seems like it is not going to happen. I am still praying. And still hoping....And still dreaming about the time. So if you could say a prayer or two as well, I'd really appreciate it....Have a wonderful week! Till I write again....



17 comments:

  1. It sounds so nice and I like that you are going to Joannes for some fabric that is always fun. I hope you do get to go to Texas for a visit.
    Your church sound so nice. I think you can be a very proud Mama. :)
    Well, have a great week, I can't wait to see what you are going to make next.

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  2. Oh Debbie...if you only knew how this is ministering to my spirit!!! I am jumping applauding..yelling AMEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    I have been discussing this with my husband the last few days. I was a little taken back by some things said that basically took credit for their children's behavior...good behavior..even if it was just a shot in time and time is still to come.

    I cried to my husband..what does that say to us that were faithful, who did the same thing and yet some of our children made choices that weren't in our plans for their life...do I take credit for their mistakes....or do I take pride in their success? Either is the wrong response.

    It is in God's plan and He is after their heart...which has always been my prayer...their heart, even if at times the shot in time I see doesn't look so great...He isn't
    finished yet.

    Should your rejoice in the work God did in your son's life and the seeds you planted...yes!!! But with your wisdom you also didn't touch God's Glory...you gave the final fruit of his life to God.

    Thank you soooooooooooooooo much for this post...you wrote it for me and the great thing about it is that you come for a longer walk than I have walked...so your wisdom pours out.

    Thanks....see you are full of wisdom and grace.

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  3. Oh praying for that trip to Texas!!! It is hot here!!!!

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  4. What a wonderful wisdom-filled
    post, Debbie! I have to agree
    with Janette. I was put in the
    same position just today and
    didn't feel I said the right
    thing either. All credit goes
    to the Lord of course but we
    do have a big part as His
    instruments in raising our
    children correctly.
    I prayed and will continue to
    pray that you can make that
    wonderful trip to be with your
    sweet girl.
    Hugs~

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  5. Hi Debbie, Loved reading this post-we are so much alike because I'm really quiet in big groups but once I get to know someone I'm not quiet at all-or if we have something in common it is much easier. It is such a blessing to see how the Lord uses our grown kids and how He ministers through them, inspite of the things we may have done differently. As for your going to Mel's-I'm going to be praying like crazy for it to come to pass.
    Love you my friend.
    Noreen

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  6. I am SO, SO like you ... I do not do well at all in large groups. But in a smaller group where I've gotten to know everyone well, then I can open up.

    I'm praying that you will be able to get to Melody's next month. 2 1/2 years is long enough, right? Right!

    I love your new blog header ... and that it includes that gorgeous quilt that Noreen made for you. {{hug}}

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  7. Debbie,
    What a sweet Mama's heart! I think sometimes we're just taken off guard when someone gushes praise. It's so clear that you give God the glory for the work He's done in your son!

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  8. Hi Debbie thanks so much for the kind comment & taking the time to leave one :) I appreciate it
    XO

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  9. I have that same response when someone makes a comment about one of my son's character or achievements...like I really had anything to do with it.
    Your right, then am I willing to take the responsibility when they go their own way? We are one of those folks that are in the trusting phase right now.
    Encouraging post

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  10. Hi Debbie,

    Great post....!!!!

    Here's hoping you can go help Mel with the nursery. I helped with Stacy's in OK before Bella was born and it was great fun.

    Tell your sister I do not envy her preparations for tent camping but I do love June lake. We skied June Mountain one year but have never camped, but love Mammoth which is just around the corner. I do love the beauty of camping though and living amongst God's beauty.

    Enjoy your day
    Love
    M

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  11. This is one of the best written,most profound posts that I have read in blogland. What a perfect reminder for me. Parenting is a huge job and so often we personally take credit or blame, when we can't take either. It is all by God's amazing grace. Thank you for sharing this Debbie.

    By the way, I go to a small church too and I really enjoy it.

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  12. I love the colors in the quilt on your header. Beautiful!

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  13. Hi, I just came over from Janette's blog. I so enjoyed your post.
    We have alot in common. I also have 3 boys and a girl. I married my highschool sweetheart 37 yrs. ago and we have 8 grandchildren.
    I'm happy for your son in his small church. My husband pastored in a small church when our children were young. I loved the personalness of the parishsoners.
    I guess that is why we have always attended smaller ones. I have tried larger churches, thinking I wanted some of the x-tras they had to offer. But was always led back to familiar.
    I have also reflected on the mistakes I made with my children as they were growing-it's something I think all of us do. But I decided I didn't do too bad, considering the great adults they've turned out to be.
    I am thankful for the grace the Lord provided for them and myself during their rearing years. I would've never made it without it!
    I just became a follower.
    Blessings.

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  14. Oh no...sorry about the washer. It is always something, isn't it?

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  15. Hi Deb - sounds like your week is going well....you always seem to find the enjoyment in life and it shines in your blog! I have to agree...a church family is such a tremendous blessing!! So glad you are falling in love with yours:)

    Have a great weekend!! Hugs -

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  16. God bless your little pink heart! I needed to hear this. Now I'm wondering how much of the Lord's thunder I've stolen in years gone by. I'm thinking "a bunch".

    We're still trying to find our church home since our move back to the Pacific NW. I'm inclined towards the larger ones, but now I'm re-considering that. A smallish body just might be good for us at this stage in our lives.

    Blessings,
    Kathleen

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  17. Hello Dear Debbie,
    First things first, I adore the header photo, the quilt that Noreen made is absolutely beautiful!!
    And now just what is slowing down, I almost forgot what that is! LOL. I am so glad that you have had some time to slow down as you have been so busy, now you must get some rest before that baby comes.
    I can just see you standing there listening to these ladies talk about James, and I know you are so proud of him, and what God is doing through him, I never cease to marvel at how God directs his children's lives.
    Your thoughts on raising our children is so on target! You are such a blessing!

    I will be praying that you get to Mel's to help her.
    What a joy to read this post,
    love,
    Sue

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I am so glad that you would take the time to comment on my thoughts and feelings, it is such a blessing to me!